How to Get Your Partner on Board With Your Health Goals: A Realistic Step-by-Step Guide
So you've decided to take your health into your own hands—amazing! Maybe you're focused on eating better, moving more, getting your hormones balanced, or finally kicking sugar to the curb. But now comes the tricky part... what do you do when your partner isn’t exactly jumping on the health train with you?
Don’t worry—you’re not alone. This is something many of my clients struggle with, especially busy women over 35 who are going through hormonal shifts and trying to reclaim their energy, metabolism, and confidence.
Let’s talk about how to get your partner on board with your new healthy lifestyle—without nagging, pushing, or creating tension. This isn’t about forcing anyone to change. It’s about creating understanding, connection, and a home environment that supports the life you’re building.
Step 1: Identify the Real Obstacles (It Might Not Be What You Think)
Before you talk to your partner, take a moment to get honest with yourself.
Ask yourself:
What exactly do I want from my partner?
What’s actually getting in the way of them being supportive?
Is it resistance to change, lack of knowledge, fear of being judged, or something else?
👉 Example: Maybe your partner keeps bringing home chips and ice cream. Are they trying to sabotage you—or are they just doing what they've always done because they don’t realize it makes things harder for you?
When you get clear on the real why behind the frustration, you're in a better place to move forward without defensiveness.
Step 2: Open Up Communication (Without Making It a Lecture)
Let’s be real—no one likes being told what to do. So instead of coming in hot with “I’m changing everything and you need to get with the program,” try something more vulnerable and collaborative.
💬 Try saying:
“Hey, I’ve been thinking a lot about my health lately. I want to feel better in my body and have more energy. I know I’m going to make some changes, and I’d love to talk about how that might look in our day-to-day life.”
The goal here isn’t to convince them to change everything right away. It’s just to open the door to supportive, ongoing conversations.
Step 3: Stay Curious (Not Judgmental)
Maybe they roll their eyes when you pull out your green smoothie. Maybe they grumble about “rabbit food” when you serve roasted veggies. Instead of reacting with frustration, stay curious.
🧐 Ask questions like:
“What’s your biggest hesitation about eating this way?”
“What would feel doable for you?”
“How did your family approach food when you were growing up?”
Staying curious helps you understand where they’re coming from—and it builds a bridge instead of a wall.
Step 4: Go First (Lead by Example)
The best way to inspire change? Model it.
When your partner sees you with more energy, fewer mood swings, and feeling confident in your skin, they’ll take notice.
You don’t need to preach. Just live it.
Cook delicious meals and invite them to try a bite.
Invite them for a walk, not a workout.
Let them see you enjoying the process—not suffering through it.
✨ Tip: Let your results do the talking. Often, your positive glow will spark curiosity on its own.
Step 5: Accept Responsibility for Your Journey
You’re not responsible for your partner’s health. You’re only responsible for your own.
Even if they don’t jump on board right away (or ever), that doesn’t mean you can’t stay committed.
🧠 Mindset shift:
Instead of “Why won’t they support me?” try,
“How can I stay consistent in a way that feels good and peaceful, no matter what’s happening around me?”
Letting go of control is liberating. It allows you to stop waiting for them to change and start showing up fully for yourself.
Step 6: Find the Middle Ground
Sometimes compromise is key. If they’re not into your kale salad, can you make a version of taco night that works for both of you? If they’re not ready to give up pizza Fridays, can you make a healthier homemade version together?
💡 Ideas to try:
Make one “healthier” dinner a week as a team activity
Create a shared grocery list that includes your staples and theirs
Agree on a “no pressure” policy where no one comments on the other’s plate
These small tweaks help both of you feel respected and heard—without turning the dinner table into a battleground.
Step 7: Celebrate the Wins—Together
When your partner does anything supportive—whether it’s taking a walk with you, trying your new recipe, or just listening—celebrate it.
People love to feel appreciated, and positive reinforcement goes a long way.
“Thanks for trying that stir fry with me. It meant a lot.”
“It felt so good to move together after dinner tonight!”
Your journey will feel so much lighter when you’re focused on what’s working instead of what’s not.
You Don’t Need Their Full Buy-In to Make Progress
Would it be great if your partner was just as excited about chia pudding and resistance training as you are? Sure. But the truth is, you don’t need their full buy-in to succeed.
What you need is:
Your own internal commitment
An open line of communication
A willingness to lead by example
And a little grace—for yourself and your partner
You’ve got this. And who knows—when they see how incredible you’re feeling, they might just surprise you.